The Resort... PUBLIC/CHAOS EDITION (Not for the ever-serious of heart)

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT.
OK, so this is a grand-scale version of a basically-random RP that Misty and I do on PictoChat. It's a bunch of characters (formerly just characters appearing in SSB4, but since expanded to include ANY CHARACTER) at some kind of vacation resort thing.
There will be things.
There will be stuff.
There will be nodding.
There will be wooden shacks in fields for some reason.
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

• Don't worry about making forms, and DEFINITELY don't worry about RPing only characters you know. There will still be a character list, so we don't lose track of who's "claimed" who, but that's it.
  
• This is a silly RP, so breaking character isn't really a serious issue here. Especially if it's a character you don't know. xD
  
• Yes, you may expand and describe various parts of the resort however you see fit. We hardly know what's in it and how it's laid out as it is.
  
• You can RP in ANY FORMAT YOU LIKE. Script-style. Normal style. BOTH STYLES. GO FOR IT GO GO GO
  
• BLAH BLAH BLAH I'M TIRED OF WRITING RULES WE DON'T NEED 'EM HERE LET'S GO AW YEEEEE
  

~CHARACTER LIST AW YE~

RPed by Whitefeather:
Bayonetta
Samantha Pearce
Alexa Bonucci
Cartoon John Lennon
Cartoon Ringo Starr
Turanga Leela
Gumi
Gumi (Adult)
Gumi (Sweet)

RPed by Stealthvixen:
Donald Trump's hair

RPed by Jewelsky:
Tord Larsson

RPed by Mistystar:
Mandy McKenna
Gabby Leclair
Cartoon Paul McCartney
Cartoon George Harrison
Philip J. Fry
Gumi (NativeFat)
Gumi (Power)

RPed by Willowrose:
Ghirahim

A golden fleece washed up on the sandy white shores.

It was Donald Trump's hair (with a suitcase and sunglasses)


FORM
Name: Donald Trump's hair
Species: Donald Trump's hair
Gender: Donald Trump's hair
Personality: The bleached hamster fuzz normally seated atop Donald Trump's head
Abilities and powers: being Donald Trump's hair

At this very moment, an extremely tall, black-haired woman with glasses strolled by with an incredibly cocky stride.

She happened to glance down at the fuzzy mass on the beach.

She stopped and smirked.

"What have we got here?" she questioned slowly and coolly, with her English accent further enhancing this coolness. "A runaway toupee? I don't blame you, darling."

(SORRY, NOT SORRY.
*INTRODUCTION SCREEN*
Name: Bayonetta (Though it's actually not her real name~)
Species: Human (Umbra Witch)
Gender-*Suddenly gets interrupted* "What, are you blind, love?"
Age: Rather roughly 600
Powers and-*Suddenly interrupted again* "Oh, come on; let's not be here all (*LANGUAGE, MISSY*) ... night!")

The sunglasses moved upwards til they pointed in Bayonetta's direction.

"I didn't run away." The hideous head of horse mane clarified.

"I was replaced because the manager said my golden color was not the right color to appeal to millennials."

A bizarre alien kissing-like noise eminated from the entangled object of horror.

Bayonetta appeared almost completely unfazed. "Mmmm... I understand, dear," she cooed teasingly. "So you're absolutely off your rocker." It was agonizingly clear that she had heard the fluff ball's words as a lunatic's ramblings.

"No, but I am off my talker." The hair replied. It dragged itself by weak, frazzled clumps of strands, carrying the suitcase along the way. "Anyway, I'm here on vacation and I need to find a hotel. Do you know where there's one I can buy?"

A sarcastic, disdainful chuckle rose from Bayonetta's throat behind closed lips, pulled tightly in an arrogant smile. "How droll." Then, moving on to answering the hair's question, she decided to run with this opportunity to have a little fun. "Actually, you couldn't have come at a better time, you know," she told the clump of fuzz, her tone absolutely dripping with overemphasis. "I know just the perfect place. Come along, now..." Suddenly, she gracefully bent down, grasped the hairy mass with the thumb and index finger of one of her gloved hands, and rose again, lifting it into the air. "We mustn't waste a moment," she told it, dangling it at her eye level, a small distance from her face. Then, with a confident stride, she began strolling towards the location she had mentioned.

The entire way to the location, the hair said nothing, but eminated various kissing, burping, grunting and wheezing noises the whole way. When their destination was within view, it finally spoke up:

"You left my suitcase back there. I can see how you got your job."

What appeared to be a somewhat large, old, wooden building stood on the horizon.
Bayonetta paused in her tracks. "Really? I'm sorry. I must have been distracted somehow and missed the bit where you left it behind," she remarked unconcernedly, and with incredible snark, placing noticeable emphasis on the word "you". "Listen, love. I'm a woman of many, many strengths, but patience simply isn't one of them," she told the hair. "I'm afraid you'll have to make a choice. We can go all the way back to retrieve your things, with me leaving you on your own afterwards... OR we can simply carry on towards our destination as planned, and you can go back for your suitcase after you've at least expressed interest in acquiring this establishment." She then proceeded to ham it up. "After all, it's in SUCH trouble... If you don't do something now, you may come back to find it's been demolished already! Such a wasted opportunity."

By the time her sentence was finished the hair had already teleported to the top of her head. "Take me in. I'll hire someone to get my suitcase later." It's sunglasses fell off, exposing yet more of its grotesque form to any passers by. The hair didn't seem to notice.

((HERE WE GO, MY BODY IS READY))

((Name: Tord Larsson
Species: preeeetty sure he's human
Gender: hason meko he's… he's male
Powers/abilities: does "most trigger-happy person on the planet" count as a power/ability because that's him
Appearance: official art by Paul ter Voorde | return appearance in The End Part 1 (also by Paul ter Voorde)
Personality: this is all you will ever need to know about him ok

Erin wrote:haven't you people ever heard of mysteriously leaving your friends to wonder what happened to you and come back years later just to pretend to be friends with them only so you can attempt to take over the world with a giant robot and literally end one of their lives

this guy is a total jerk and I hate him a lot but I figured he'd be fun to play out-of-character in a joke rp lol we'll see how badly I can butcher him this should be fun
99% sure he's ESTP (lol the only character I'm not really sure about my type for is Tom who is also my favorite isn't that weird)
… aaaaalso he's from Eddsworld if you haven't deduced that
please don't watch eddsworld ever
it will instantly kill every cell in your body))

((don't know where to come in yet, or if I have to wait to be accepted, so I'll just leave the form here for now and actually start rping whenever that is deemed permissible))

((THIS RP IS AGGRESSIVELY RANDOM. JOIN WHENEVER AND HOWEVER YOU PLEASE. RECOMMENDED: HOTEL RESORT RECEPTIONIST, TEMPORARILY. WELCOME TO TOTAL FREEDOM.))

((HA I would love to see Tord as a receptionist, that'd be hilarious yes I'LL DO IT))

After a failed attempt at destroying Tom's life and/or taking over the world, Tord had somehow landed a simple job as the receptionist of a hotel. His current job wasn't nearly as exciting as the old Red Leader days, of course, but it would have to do. Maybe someday, he'd pick all that back up again… Nah, who was he kidding? The dreams of those days were long dead by this point. Wistfully, the Norwegian sighed, absentmindedly glancing out the window as he placed his head down on the receptionist's desk. But—what was that he saw? A proud-looking, black-haired woman, and some kind of… weird… was that a dishrag? A sentient dishrag? He'd seen some weird things, but…
You're hallucinating again. It certainly wouldn't be the first time, he told himself intently, shaking his head as though it would shake away the sight of that… thing.

((this sounds really serious for a random RP but I'm just setting up the mood to sound overdramatic if it makes any sense to you ok night))

(I'm now about to combine my original plans with this new development. IMPROVVVVVV~)

Suddenly, Bayonetta realized that, horrifyingly, the animated fuzz had somehow made its way to the top of her head while she was speaking. "AUGH!" Without hesitation, she plucked it off, her skin crawling from head to toe in absolute disgust. Who knows where it had been, and what was hiding in it? Actually, she very nearly chucked the tangled mess away right then and there, but just barely managed to refrain from doing so. After all, she'd be rid of it soon enough. "Ahem... yes. Right, then," she responded simply, quickly regaining composure. After convincing the hair that this old, rickety shack was, in fact, a hotel in serious need of help, and that he should snap it up immediately, she could have a good laugh and be on her way.
At least, that's what she had planned.
When Bayonetta stepped into the structure, she was briefly stunned to see a crude desk with a young man- an actual person, in a place like this- behind it.
Actually, the way it was laid out... this room appeared to be...
A RECEPTION AREA.
"... What the-"
Suddenly, just as the bewildered witch was a moment away from completing her exclamation, a colossal, white, living right-hand glove floated into view just outside.
"LANGUAAAAAAGE!!" it somehow shouted at her with a booming voice, despite not possessing a mouth. "What did we tell you about keeping within SITE RULES?!" Then, just as quickly as it had appeared, it floated off.
"... fuzz?" she finished, deadpan. Why even have me in this RP, then, if you're just going to cage me with these ridiculous rules?? she remarked mentally, slowly turning her head and, glasses gleaming, shooting a wicked glare towards the... camera, if you will.
After all of this, she simply returned her attention to the scene as normal.

(Ouch. *Shields self from Bayo's evil eye*
By the way, that was definitely the Master Hand from SSB. xD He always does this in our original version of the Resort RP on PictoChat, too.)

"Wow! Push in' the boundaries. Great goin', sweetheart!" The salmonellosic mass congratulated her. "My RPer never lets any of her characters THINK about curses, let alone acknowledge them behind a veil of censorship. You win the award for 2016, as being...how millennials say....EDGY."

The hair stood up and did a dorky jig on her shoulder.

Okay. So he wasn't hallucinating this time. The quirkiness of these guys sorta reminded him of the "friends" he used to have… and, now that he had a closer look, the dishrag he had seen before actually turned out to be a clump of golden hair, which was significantly less disturbing for some reason.
Upon seeing the massive white glove, Tord stifled a laugh at the woman's frustrated reaction to being chastised. "It happens to the best of us," he told her good-naturedly. "I used to keep a tally every day, but I lost track." He tried to repress his flashbacks of all the poorly made MLG memes and YTPs he'd found himself in before, only half-succeeding. His RPer then forced him to snap out of it and remember that he had an actual job to do here. "Ah, right—How may I help you two?"

The hair leaped onto the counter, lamding so hard that an anime dust shockwave resonated around it.

"I'd like to buy the whole hotel, so I can get a room for free."

"I dunno… Not sure if that's exactly legal…" Tord quickly shot a few glances across the room, just to make sure only the three of them were there. "How much are you willing to pay?" he murmured to the hair in a lower voice. This could be his chance! He could finally reclaim his dreams, leave this shabby hotel, call Paul and Pat back up—"Red Leader is back! World domination is a go!" he'd tell them ecstatically, fully prepared to obliterate anything in their path. He could even rebuild his giant robot with enough funds, improving it with such features as imperviousness to that eyeless twerp's pathetic harpoons. It all worked out perfectly in his head. This disgusting little rat of hair could be his salvation.

When the others seemed to side with her after what just happened, the already-confident witch stood especially tall, somehow managing to tower even higher than usual, and looked down at the rest with a smug expression on her face. You know, you lot might not be quite so bad after all, she commented inwardly. She then glanced down at the horrible hair creature on the desk again. ... Well... Actually, maybe not so much in the furball's case. Ugh... Repulsive... thing.
However, she was getting sidetracked again.
"Oooooh, that's more like it," Bayonetta cooed, bending forward until she was able to casually lean upon her crossed forearms atop the desk, when Tord seemed to express some interest in the hair's (admittedly absurd) plan. Now, despite seeming to have hit a bump in the road earlier, it was time for HER plan to begin paying off; time to finally have some fun. "You may wish to sit down, boy," she told the young man with a smirk before looking over at the fluff beside her. "Well? You heard the boy... How much is an incredibly powerful, successful businessmane such as yourself willing to part with for this fine establishment?" she asked the fuzzy lump, laying it on a mile thick.

The hair seemed to INFLATE, literally, like a big hairy koosh! It even made a balloon-blowing up sound as it did so.

"WUN MILL-YUN DOLLRSSSS."

The corner of Bayonetta's mouth twitched up in amusement, and she let out a single, brief laugh. "Ha!" However, she had no intention of stopping there. Oh, no. She was going to take this as far as she could. "Don't tell me THAT'S the best you can do, pompom!" she teased playfully. "How underwhelming..."

"....Sweetheart, let the kid do the negotiations, or I'll trade YOU in as free labor."

"Well, that's simply foolish, dear. You wouldn't overpay that much," Bayonetta retorted mockingly, enjoying this very much. She then turned her attention back to the young man behind the counter. She didn't say anything, but she did vaguely motion upwards, as if silently, slyly suggesting he should try to get away with as high a price as possible.

Tord's jaw dropped. "A million…" he breathed in shock, barely noticing the hair's comically absurd inflation. And even more—the woman seemed to be trying to raise the price! He nodded slowly, knowing he could never turn down an opportunity like this. "Yes… One million dollars isn't nearly enough… I mean, this is a whole hotel we're talking about. Ten million is the least I could settle for." He was trying not to grin too much as his emphatic words left his mouth, but he had a feeling his excitement was still coming through.